Chair Shots With Killem Faulkner: Mr. Steal Your Finisher Dynamite

AEW rolled into Phoenix, AZ with some real momentum on its side – the return of the ranking system has brought a renewed significance to every match, and with the top champions and challengers really cooking at the moment, it is paramount for the company to keep that upward trend going as we get closer to Revolution in March. This week promised a #1 contender’s match for the men’s world champion, a tune-up match for the presumptive #1 contender for the women’s world championship, and a massive tag title match. Did the show live up to its potential? Let’s take a look at all the best and worst of this week’s Dynamite.

Cheers

• First and foremost, congratulations are in order as Sting is a champion for the first time in his AEW career and for the first time since he was TNA champ in 2011. The tornado tag main event was pretty great overall, including one of the best Bossman/Black Hole Slams you’ll ever see as Big Bill caught Darby Allin flying through the ropes to the outside of the ring. I know there are rumors that Ricky Starks is on his way out of the company and heading to WWE, which would be sad because I really think he’s a breakout star in waiting but I don’t think he’ll get treated as such in the Fed. If that is the case, however, this would be a great match to bow out on, as he looked like he was actually going to pull off the upset for his team on a few occasions. Big Bill was mostly there to be on the receiving end of a lot of big spots including a Coffin Drop and being put through a table by Allin. Starks actually delivered the most impressive offense for his team, including a Scorpion Death Drop and a spear on Sting. It wasn’t enough, of course, but he looked good in defeat even though he took the pin.
• Speaking of the main event, it was odd that the Young Bucks didn’t involve themselves somehow and actually allowed Sting and Darby to win the titles, but they made up for it after the match by storming the ring in pristine white suits carrying matching baseball bats, which they used to lay out Sting and Darby before turning their attention to Sting’s adult sons, who had joined their dad in the ring to celebrate. After taking a few not amazing-looking shots at the Stinger Brothers (they’re not wrestlers apparently, it’s okay) they went back to beating down their actual rivals, busting Darby open to leave massive bloodstains on their all-white outfits. Matthew and Nicholas busted out their newly rechristened EVP Trigger on Darby and punted Sting to close out the night, presumably setting up a title match at Revolution in the Icon’s retirement match. It’s weird to think that, in storyline, the best outcome for the company and fans would be for the dastardly heels to win so that Sting doesn’t take a title into retirement with him, but of course I’m sure they’ll make an announcement ahead of time to address what will happen if Sting and Darby retain. Just saying, it feels like the Bucks carrying the belts into Revolution would have been a better plan, but I digress. The Bucks promised last week they would find a way to get Darby and Sting’s attention after Darby refused to form a trio with them, so of course the best way to do that was to commit unspeakable acts of violence on both men and Sting’s family. That is admittedly pretty hard to ignore.
• The actual best match of the night (which we aren’t officially awarding anymore) was actually the opener between Swerve Strickland and Hangman Adam Page. There was no stipulation here so it was obviously going to take a lot to live up to the standard set by their Texas death match at Full Gear. One way they made up for the lack of advertiser-unfriendly violence was by having some actual stakes – the winner of the match would get to face Samoa Joe for the world title at Revolution. The other way this match attempted to live up to the standard of their two previous matches was by going for a full 30 minutes and pushing the boundaries of a regular non-hardcore match. There was a table spot in which Strickland used Page’s own Deadeye, and a chair came into play as Page hit Prince Nana in the back with it only to have it kicked into his own face by Strickland a moment later. Dodgy application of disqualification rules aside, however, this match banged. Swerve hit a Buckshot Lariat on Hangman and barely survived Page hitting the same lariat on him by getting his foot on the bottom rope. Page was mainly able to get offense in due to an ankle injury suffered by his opponent, while Swerve was able to dominate the majority of the match but never able to fully put his rival away. The match ended as the ref counted 2 on a pinfall attempt by Swerve, but the bell rang before the 3 count. Swerve got on the mic and asked for 5 more minutes, which an increasingly heelish Page declined, stating that Swerve had to beat him to become #1 contender and since he failed to do so, he’d have to go to the back of the line. Tony Schiavone interrupted to announce Revolution’s world title match would instead be a triple threat. The result of the match made sense as both men deserve a shot at the world title and have a more obvious feud with each other than with the champion. I suspect this also might be an easy way to get the belt off Joe and onto Swerve without making the final boss look weak since Page can be the one to take the pinfall. That wouldn’t be a bad idea at all especially since it allows Page and Strickland to face off again, with their undeniable in-ring chemistry undoubtedly improving the resulting match.
• I’ve criticized Tony Khan for overhyping announcements in the past, and although I will absolutely acknowledge that the news of AEW having an event in Boston breaking earlier in the day wasn’t ideal, I will say the announcement that the event would be called “Big Business” was actually worth the hype. I know, I know, just naming the event doesn’t seem like that big of a deal, but the implication that this would be an industry-changing event coupled with the graphic that labeled the host city “Bo$$ton” pretty heavily implies that Mercedes Moné will make her AEW debut that night. The only thing that is left up to speculation is whether she will be alone, as another huge free agent would also seemingly fit the theme: the Rainmaker Kazuchika Okada, whose entrance music begins with the sound of a coin dropping and who is often accompanied to the ring by fake money with his face printed on it falling from the sky. If it’s only Moné debuting in her hometown, this announcement will retroactively seem a little less worthy of the hype, but only slightly in my opinion. But just imagine if both Moné and Okada show up in Boston on the 13th. It’ll be anarchy! There’ll be rioting in the aisles! Human sacrifice! Dogs and cats living together! Mass hysteria! Well…maybe not all that, but it’ll be a big deal anyway.

Boos

• Honestly, I can’t think of a single thing to really complain about this week! It was a good episode and nothing really stood out in a negative way.

Parting Shots

• I do want to circle back to something I mentioned last week just to make sure I’m not going to be misinterpreted. I said basically I’m tired of talking/hearing about the Vince McMahon WWE stuff, and that’s true, but I don’t want to be so glib that it seems like I don’t care. Let me be clear: I do not watch WWE anymore. I haven’t in quite a while. I have commented some (on Threads, where you should be too if you’re not already) on posts about Cody Rhodes and the whole fiasco with him winning the Rumble but apparently not challenging Roman. Please do not take this as me caring about or actively following WWE. I like Cody and dislike bad storytelling, which is why I commented, but at the end of the day I do not care what they do. I didn’t watch the Royal Rumble, I will not watch WrestleMania, and I have no intention of watching WWE until/unless TKO cleans house or the federal investigation into Vince concludes and anyone with knowledge or involvement is exposed. I 100% believe the victim, I’m sure she’s not the only one, and the responsibility does not end with Vince. I’m disgusted with the whole thing. I hope that’s clear enough. No further comment for realsies this time.
• Konosuke Takeshita not only beat Chris Jericho, he did it with the legend’s own submission hold! On a night when wrestlers were stealing each others signature moves right, left, and center, it was truly a surprise that Jericho didn’t just pass out but actually tapped to his own hold. I could have done without some of the shenanigans on the outside – Powerhouse Hobbs tripped Jericho up only for Sammy Guevara to hit him in the back with a chair and deliver a flying cutter off the ring steps, but Callis slid a chair into the ring and then hit Jericho with a screwdriver (that somehow didn’t draw blood?) while the ref was disposing of the phantom chair that apparently entered the ring entirely on its own. No need to investigate where that chair came from, Bryce Remsburg. I’m sure it’s totally fine to turn your back on the action for just a moment. Anyway, the finish was the most notable part of the match, and we’ll have to see if Takeshita continues to use the Walls of Jericho (which he would presumably need to rename) or if this was just a one-off. I think it would be hilarious if Takeshita stole a different move each week – in his next match, he could finish his opponent off with a Codebreaker, then a Lionsault in the match after that, and finally a Breakdown (which, yes, was part of his arsenal for a while before Miz ripped it off as the Skull-Crushing Finale) but not the Judas Effect because that move sucks.
• Toni Storm vs. Red Velvet was a decent enough match, with Storm getting the win by submission in a move that makes me wonder if her match against Deonna Purrazzo will be specifically submission-based – the Virtuosa is famous for her ability to make people tap out, so the arrogant champ might well challenge her to prove those skills at Revolution.
• I wonder if the CMLL guys will be sticking around until Forbidden Door – June feels like a long way away at the moment, but AEW hasn’t confirmed exactly when that pay-per-view will be yet and there are plenty of opportunities for crossovers going both ways until then. Bryan Danielson vs. Hechicero on Collision was great and they absolutely should run that back in the latter’s home promotion, and although the clash of styles between the Blackpool Combat Club and Hechicero, Mascara Dorada, and Volador Jr was a little clunky at times, they more than compensated for any awkwardness in the late stages of the match to deliver an overall solid outing. With the locker room emptying each of the last couple of weeks as soon as the CMLL contingent had the numbers advantage, it wouldn’t surprise me if there was some big multi-man match (maybe Stadium Stampede or Anarchy in the Arena) planned for Forbidden Door.
• Since I mentioned Danielson’s match on Collision already, I may as well give my weekly note here. But before I do that, since last week I mentioned that I hadn’t had time to watch the previous week’s Collision before writing my review, I’ll give you a *bonus* note: I hate cages with doors. If you want to escape a cage, you go over the top like God intended. Because here’s the thing: pinning someone is hard. Making someone tap out is hard. Incapacitating someone to the extent that the referee stops the match is hard. Walking out the door of a cage is the easiest thing in the world. If you’re going to have a cage with a door, at least have the referee lock it so that only heels with lackeys who can unlock the door can try to take the easy way out. Otherwise, House of Black vs. FTR and Daniel Garcia was great. This has been your bonus Collision note, now onto this week’s episode specifically. I’m glad Bryan Keith got officially added to the roster – he’s been doing good work for a while now, so that hard work should be rewarded. I also liked that there were two women’s matches on the show, though Velvet vs. Vertivixen was pretty short and one-sided. I hope AEW continues to use Collision to build up its women’s division, which is about to get even more crowded.
• Speaking of the women’s division (man, I am killing these transitions) I’m just going to throw out a quick fantasy booking scenario for Mercedes Moné’s debut: start the show with her coming to the ring to a huge ovation, give her a microphone, but before she can speak, Britt Baker’s music hits to cut her off. Have Britt come to the ring and talk about how Tony Khan has kept her on the shelf for months only to bring in some new “big name” who just wants a big payday. It would generate nuclear levels of heat for Baker in her return, set up a massive non-title feud that the women’s division has been sorely lacking, and avoid the usual “I’m just so happy to be here” promo that, although earned, isn’t always necessary (or all that interesting, for that matter) for a debuting star.

That’s it for another week – I thought this show was really good from top to bottom, with the opener and main event as the obvious highlights. Revolution still feels like a long way off, but it is less than a month away already, so I expect AEW will continue to turn up the heat on the feuds that have already been established and maybe make room for a few others to round out the card. The big tag match, which will be the last of Sting’s in-ring career, will obviously be the main focus, but I think the world title triple threat should be heavily featured also. Thanks for reading, and I hope to see you all back here next week for more Chair Shots!